Sun was conjunct Ceres in Leo the 18.08.13 , transiting my 8th house and trine to my Aries IC.
I was on the road this day, listening to a mix tape a former love made for me. He died thirteen years ago. I have not had it in my hands for years. The tape is twenty years old and labelled with “Maybe it´s just music, but it´s just another expression of love”. It was a bittersweet and mixed feeling. It was a moment of perfection and harmony. I felt deeply touched.
Sometimes you love somebody, and the love does not die, even if the relationship is over, even in death, even after decades. The uniqueness of this love is still fresh for moments, after twenty years.
My new love touches soft spots deep inside of me, it remembers me of the time twenty years ago.
To love means always the risk to lose the one you love. Death is the final barrier. It needs trust and faith and strength to take it on with it.
The sky was dark with clouds while I was on the road. They tore open. The sun was there. And suddenly – a bright and brilliant double rainbow against the clouds that was so beautiful it brought me to tears.
A loss means future – to allow yourself to love deeply means transformation.
There is no love without loss.